Q1) You've apparently done well for yourself, Michael. How rich are you?

Richer than you, the devil, and most of the putzes schlepping downtown to Wall Street everyday. I can tell you that. Want us to handle your account?

Q2) All $1200 of it? Hey I'm a reporter. (laughs, briefly) Your ethics and the ethics of your firm have been questioned in the press recently. Care to comment?

Ethics are my friend. They are one tool in a kit that is useful for one thing: Make our clients millions, make ourselves millions.

Q3) What do you mean, ethics are a tool?

Look, if you're a potential client, and it's clear to me that ethics are your thing, well hey, I can do that. I can be ethical and still make you a fortune. We do what works, and that includes ethics. Try us.

Q4) Let me pose this question another way then: If ethics isn't my thing, does that mean that it's okay for you to manage my account unethically?

We don't manage your account. It's $1200, right. I don't think so. That's barely commission on 100 shares of the kinds of issues we're putting our clients into.

Q5) You're very young to be so successful. What kinds of things does a young guy like you do with that much wealth?

Houses, Ferarris, women, not in any particular order. Any toy you can name. And let me tell you something about the age thing. I'm over the hill by the standards of our firm. I'm near retirement and death at age 27. Not that I'm not healthy and happy. I'm just telling you, it's a good thing I got it while I could, because our guys in the Boiler Room, my new young turks, they're lean, they're hungry, and it's those guys that would be managing your money when you give it to us. You won't get some old fogey like me. I just run the place.

Q6) What are the hot issues your firm is pushing?

Trick question, huh? Do I look like an asshole? I can tell you what went down last year. Last year, for every thousand dollars a client gave us, we returned ten thousand. Nobody else can say that. So don't ask me what issues we're putting you into. It changes weekly. The investment is in us and our skills. That's what we're good at. Fluidity. Liquidity.

Q7) What do you think of dot com investments?

A lot of established people feel this may be one giant "speculative bubble." Dinosaurs. You don't go anywhere without speculating. The dot com thing? We're in, big time. I go to three or four launch parties a night for prospects that are so hot, you can smell my shoe leather burning. I do it for a reason: to make my clients rich, and make myself rich. Dot com? Huge.

Q8) Any particular area your pushing?

Yeah, ethics.com. Just kidding, no like I said it changes weekly. That's why you need experts watching it for you.

Q9) If I'm on line, can't I be watching it for myself?

That's the rub. That on line thing isn't reliable. It's about relationships. We have them. The average dentist, brain surgeon, whatever, that's giving us their money to manage, they're looking at teeth and brains all day. They have to rely on professionals.

Q10) Any final advice for our readers Michael?

Send us your money. Watch it grow.

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